DOMO...

saje2

Jom kita ketawa sama2!!

i) Pilih bulan kelahiran anda:

Januari - Aku cinta

Februari - Aku gigit

Mac - Aku belasah

April - Aku peluk

Mei - Aku terhantuk

Jun - Aku terkentut depan

Julai - Aku menari dengan

Ogos - Aku pergi dating dengan

September - Aku lambai dekat

Oktober - Aku muntah depan

November - Aku jerit dekat

Disember - Aku terlanggar

ii) Pilih nombor hari jadi anda:

1 - Mak aku

2 - Komputer aku

3 - Liverpool

4 - Garfield

5 - Musuh dalam selimut aku

6 - Gangster

7 - Handphone aku

8 - Gerrard

9 - Driver Bas

10 - Semut

11- Kawan baik aku

12 - Polis

13 - Taik kucing

14 - Patung barbie

15 - Lee Chong Wei

16 - Mak Mertua aku

17 - Mak tiri aku

18 - Girlfriendaku/ Boyfriend aku

19 - Makcik kantin

20 - Sharifah Amani

21 - Upin dan Ipin

22 - Siti Nurhaliza

23 - Spongebob

24 - Cristiano Ronaldo

25 - Bapuk/Maknyah

26 - Kawan aku

27 - Raja Lawak/Akademi Fantasia

28 - Jiran aku

29 - Orang gila

30 - Taylor swift

31 - Awek cun/ Jejaka tampan

iii) Pilih warna baju yang anda pakai skrg:

Putih - Sebab aku perasan cantik/hensem

Hitam - Sebab aku gila

Pink - Sebab aku suka single

Merah - Sebab mak aku suruh

Biru - Sebab aku tak tahan

Hijau - Sebab aku baik hati

Ungu - Sebab aku cemburu

Kelabu - Sebab bomoh suruh

Kuning - Sebab suka hati aku la

Oren - Sebab aku baru putus cinta

Coklat - Sebab aku tak tentu arah

Lain-lain - Sebab aku fikir aku hebat

KONGSI JAWAPAN ANDA~ :)

jom smua, hilangkn stress n bosan! ^^

tips elak saman..hu2..:)

mcm mana nak ELAK SAMAN & KELENTONG POLIS..?!

pernah x kau rasa cuak bila kau tgh sebuk2 drive kete pastu tetiba kau terpaksa benti kete kau kat tepi jalan utk elak roadblock?xkira lah JPJ@POLIS.

aku selalu gak kene mcm tue.tp aku kasik alasan yg superb.here some tips for you.

1) tinted kete gelap mcm nak avoid paparazzi

alasan yg sesuai: "nie kenderaan family la encik. sumpah, saya xtahu ape2.saya baru pulang dari U nie.baru pasang niat nak hantar adik pegi tuition/ baru nak pegi rumah kawan yg dah lama xjumpa."

ps: konfem dia akan kasik kau lepas pnya la.dia pon ada hati dan perasaan.kalau x, lesap lah duit korang nak bayar saman.

2) lampu kete yg kaler putih bajet mcm nk lain dari org

alasan: ohh sorrry sgt2. (buat muka puppy face). nie abg i pnya keje. i pnjam kereta dia aje nie for temporary.kete i masuk bengkel. ada org langgar.sorry la bang..sorry sgt.nnti i suruh dia tuka lampu kpd warna yg asal. (sila buat suara gedik)

3)bunyi ekzos mcm kau sorang je ade kete

alasan:"saya baru aje tuka ekzos kete bang.baru balik dari bengkel nie.tauke tue cakap, puspakom lepas KOT bunyi ekzos nie. so,saya bayar ajelah dia.sorry bang.saya betol2 x tahu.nnti saya tukar balik kalau saya ADA DUIT EKSTRA. ;P"

4) enjin kete yg bukan setended.bajet nak race tgh jalan la tue

alasan: abg JPJ/POLIS x akan tnya kau samada kau yg RENOVATE baik pnya kete tue kalau kau nie POMPUAN.dia cuma pesan je, "sepatutnya, kami kena tahan kete adik.tp xpela adik.adik boleh balik.saya abaikan kesalahan adik"

pastu, kau cakap lah "terima kasih bang.saya terhutang budi dgn abg.kalau x,konfem mak n bapak saya gelabah saya balik lewat nnti. "

5) no plet kete kecik macam haram nak baca + tulisan xtimbul, x mcm yg normal pnya

alasan: "aritu, kete nie ada org buat dajal.dorang patahkan tulisan kat no plet nie.saya geram sgt.trus saya buat tulisan tue xtimbul.baru padan muka dorang.saya tahu saya salah.tp ada gunanya saya buat mcm nie.xperlu lah saya kena tukar tiap2 bulan. sorry ek bang. plis, gimme another chance" (sila buat muka ketat+serious+gedik)

6) x taruk sticker P sbb dah pndai drive mcm pro

alasan:"astagha, saya lupa nak taruk sticker P bang sbb kete nie dah lama dah xde org drive.saya baru je balik nie.baru smpi kat rumah. tetiba mak saya suruh pegi pasar beli sayur.seriously, xsengaja nie bang.sejujurnya,saya dah pasang NIAT nak beli sticker P kat kedai runcit nie last2, abg dah tahan saya. sorry la abg ek? "

7)roadtax dah expired date

alasan: "abg,saya xreti nak letak roadtax dkat permukaan cermin kete. saya takut senget.nnti xpsl2 pale abg senget.roadtax saya dah bayar, sticker dia pon ada kat uma.cuma xde org nak pasang je.biasalah kan?org bujang.xpela abg, nnti saya suruh org psgkan.

8) xde lesen tp muka matured

alasan: "bang,lesen saya dah siap dah.tp P saya dgn ckgu memandu saya.esok bru dapat.sorry la bang.kesalahan kecik nie bang.penat saya usaha nak amek lesen memandu.last2,kena saman sbb xde lesen. sdgkan saya ada lesen.xberbaloi bang.sia2 je saya labur RM 650 utk amek lesen kete/motor kalau setakat nak dpt saman lagi.abg msti faham perasaan saya kan? "

ps: alasan ini sesuai utk kaum wanita.sila buat suara manja,gedik.sila buat muka sedih spy korang xkena saman.

smua alasan2 ini direka dan dicipta oleh aku.

dan kejadian2 diatas ini bukan rekaan semata-mata

ianya realiti.bukan fantasi

dan selama ini juga, aku xpernah lagi merasai SURAT CINTA dari JPJ/POLIS

aku sentiasa lolos dlm sekatan itu. :)

My Note..(Birthy)

My birthday was earlier this week.

In 14 years with my wife, I've never once asked for any particular gift for any occasion, and she's learned not to ask for hints. Honestly, there's rarely anything I want, anyway. So she was surprised as we fooled around in bed last week when I told her that there was something in particular I want for my birthday.

Here's what I told her: Some night very soon, I want to come home early from work, make her a nice dinner, do the dishes and put our young one to bed. I want to run a bath for her, sit in the tub and wash her, dry her off, rub lotion on her body, then give her a long, sensual massage. I want to comb her hair. We can have a few candles... maybe some music. I'll spend a good, long time pampering her completely. If she thinks I'm doing a good job, and if she's in the mood for it, she might just allow me the privilege of going down on her. If she wants us to have sex, then we will... but I don't want my orgasm to be the focal point of it, and I would just as soon not orgasm at all (in fact, I'd love to hold off!). I want this night to be all about her. I want her to feel that she deserves it, to enjoy it, and to expect nothing less from me than my best effort at pampering her. I'll be happy if the last thing she thinks about as she drifts off to sleep is "when can we do this again?", while I burn as I did when we first dated, fooling around often and letting our passion boil over without consumating it.

Then we had sex, and I got off quickly, as usual. I doubt she did, though I'll note that her arousal was very evident. Maybe that had something to do with the talking, or maybe it had just been too long.

The next morning while at work, I got a phone call from my wife. "Tuesday night," was all she said. I paused, then understood, stammering something like "...yeah, great. Wow. I can't wait." We hung up, and I had an extra kick in my step all morning. I realized shortly afterward that I had an important work engagement Tuesday night. I called her back, and she said "then we'll do it on Thursday night".

Today, as I left for work, my wife gave me a hug and reminded me that tonight is the big night. I'm very, very excited. I haven't had to remind her. Now it's up to me to make this a great night for her, and not to go yammering on about my own little sexual hangups. She's playing along, so I want her to enjoy this. I want so much to tell her things that I'd enjoy (don't let me orgasm... tell me I need to wait, etc.). But I think we're more likely to discover something mutually satisfying if I don't try to orchestrate the action or place any expectations on her performance.

We're both very busy, and we're tired from having had in-laws over this past weekend. We live hectic lives (like most, I guess). So maybe we'll end up postponing the big night for lack of energy. That's OK, too - I want this to happen when we're both into it.

I'm very optimistic that she's open to this. I don't know if she envisions the night that I do, but she's obviously making an effort. Boy, does that have an effect on my attitude.

More soon, I hope.

Andainya perempuan tahu..

Apabila seorang lelaki jatuh cinta,

perempuan itu tidak semestinya punya segalanya tetapi perempuan itu adalah segalanya di hatinya.

Andainya perempuan tahu..

Apabila seorang lelaki itu mengalirkan air mata, itu bukan bermakna dia lemah, tetapi dia sedang mencari kekuatan untuk terus tabah menyintai perempuan itu....:):):)

whatever

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❤¸.•*""*•.¸❤ ❤¸.•*" "*•.¸❤❤¸.•*" "*•.¸❤ ❤¸.•*" "*•.¸❤ ❤¸.•*"
▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▓▒▒▒▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▓▒▒▒▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒♥♥♥~♥♥♥ i miss youu
❤¸.•*""*•.¸❤ ❤¸.•*" "*•.¸❤❤¸.•*" "*•.¸❤ ❤¸.•*" "*•.¸❤ ❤¸.•*"
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senyum..
hey cntk luar cntk dlm cntk dgar cni,
klau cntk snyum mzt cntk agy,
syum skit nk tngok ade x ade lgsung pipi,
klau x ade un aq msh mau cbit..